Vegan Quiche

Vegan Quiche

Quiche minus the egg...

Looks like egg but isn't. Tastes better too!

Pre-veganism you would never have convinced me that mushed up tofu has similar qualities to scrambled egg. But it fucking does. 

This was a sweet potato, spinach & caramelised onion quiche, but you could use any vegetables that don't tend to excrete a load of water whilst heating up. 

Having never made pastry prior to this moment, 'Vegan quiche' is without a doubt one of my proudest cooking achievements as of yet. 

If I can do it, then you definitely can too.

Ingredients

Pastry

1 1/2 cup of plain white flour

1 cup wholemeal flour

1 handful of finely crushed cashew nuts

1/2 cup of coconut oil

tblsp salt

1/3 cup of ice water

Quiche filling

1 block of firm tofu (press the water out of it)

1/2 cup of Nutritional Yeast

1 cup grated Vegan Cheese (I used Cheezly's Mozzarella)

small bunch of fresh coriander

250g frozen spinach (defrost in microwave)

black pepper

tblsp salt

1 sweet potato

1 white onion

1 teasp chilli powder

1 teasp turmeric powder

1 garlic clove (finely chopped)

a small handful of pumpkin seeds & flaked almonds (optional)

1. Preheat oven to 180(°C). Combine all the pastry ingredients together in food processor. BLEND! 

2. Remove pastry dough from blender & place the pastry dough on a floured surface. Roll out relatively thin.

Pastry pre-rolling

 3. Place pastry in a greased (with vegan butter substitute) tart tin and use your fingers to get the pastry where you want it.

Press that pastry in yo tin

4. Put your pastry lined tin in the oven for 10-12 minutes. Set aside.

5. Peel and chop your sweet potato into small cubes. Partly boil them (takes about 5-7mins). Drain them, rub them with olive oil and put in the oven to roast for 20 mins.

6. Finely slice the onion & fry in olive oil with a sprinkle of brown sugar to caramelise. Add the chilli powder, garlic, nutritional yeast, spinach & sweet potato once the onions are cooked. Turn off heat.

My sweet potato was white not orange :'(

7. In a mixing bowl mash up the tofu with your fingers. Add the grated cheese and all of the contents from your frying pan. Add the tumeric, black pepper & coriander (chopped). MIX.

8. Fill the pastry with the tofu mix

Quiche-licious

9. Bake in oven for 15 minutes (or till pastry is cooked through)

Remove from tin. Top with flaked almonds & pumpkin seeds if you're feeling fancy. 

CONSUME!!

The pastry was crisp and the filling was tofu heaven. #PleasedWithMyself

NOW STUFF THAT FAKE EGGY, PASTRY CASED MUSH INTO YOUR HUNGRY OPEN MOUTH-HOLE.

Cheezy stuffed squash

Cheezy stuffed Squash

Butternut Squash stuffed with 'cheesy' mustardy leeks

SO ORANGE!

People keep asking me if I miss cheese. The answer is no. Purely because there's plenty of cheesy tasting alternatives available out there for my hungry vegan mouth hole...

Ingredients

1 butternut squash

soya butter (or any vegan butter alternative)

1 large leek

150ml soya/vegan cream

3/4 pack of Vegan Cheese (I used Cheezly mozzarella)

1 tsp english mustard

1/2 cup Nutritional Yeast

1. Chop butternut squash in half. Remove seeds & carve out some of the flesh

Don't squash your squash. CHOP IT.

2. Wash & chop leeks finely. Fry with soya butter till soft.

I used more then one leek because these are tiny ones fresh from the garden. ORGANIC GOODNESS.

3.  Add the soya cream, nutritional yeast, cheese (finely grated), nutritional yeast & mustard. Turn off heat.

Creamy.

4. Pack the 'cheesy' mix into the carved out squash

5. Place the squash halves in a oven proof dish, cover with tin foil and bake for 45mins-1 hour (dependent on size of squash)

SERVE. EAT.

NOW EAT YOUR FUCKING VEGETABLES.

Mushroom Risotto

Mushroom Risotto

There won't be MUCH-ROOM in your stomach after this.

Ho-Fucking-ho.

SO oozy and nutty and SPECIAL.

Made this for New Years Eve dinner...it even went down well with my non-vegan boyfriend. 

It's a Veganised version of Jamie Oliver's 'Oozy Mushroom Risotto'

Ingredients

serves 4-6 humans

300g Arborio Risotto Rice

1 cup Nutritional Yeast

500g of mushrooms (I used a mix of portobello, button & chestnut)

4 sprigs fresh Rosemary

1 stick celery

1 onion

1/2 glass dry white wine

1 veggie stock cube

2 garlic cloves

1 pack Vegan Cheese (I used Cheezly's white cheddar)

Soya Butter or any Vegan spread

Balsamic Vinegar

Agave Syrup

Olive Oil

Salt

Pepper

Rice.

1. Put onion and celery in food processor. BLEND.

2. Fry this mixture in a tall sided pan for 5-8 minutes using olive oil

Fry that shit. I also put a portobello mushroom in my blender. 

3. Chop 2 sprigs of Rosemary finely & one clove of garlic. Add to mixture with rice. Stir for 2 minutes.

4. Add wine and stock cube. Stir for another 2 minutes until wine has boiled off. 

5. Add a good glug of boiling water. Stir constantly or the rice will stick to the pan!

Don't let that shit stick.

6. Cook until water has almost gone, then add more boiling water. Continue to do this for approx 20 mins. 

7. Tear up half the mushrooms and add to the rice. Cook for another 10 minutes. Keep adding glugs of boiling water if needed.

Tear it up.

8. Stir a big knob of 'butter' into rice. Turn off heat. Grate all of the cheese finely & mix into risotto. Add salt, pepper, nutritional yeast & balsamic vinegar to taste.

9. Put a lid on your risotto to keep it warm. 

10. Tear the remaining mushrooms into a big frying pan, drizzle with olive oil, agave syrup & add some 'butter'. Add salt & pepper & tear up the remaining rosemary. Fry for 5 mins, then put under the grill for another 8-10mins until cooked.

GRILL TO PERFECTION.

10. Dish up your risotto. Sprinkle with your grilled mushrooms.

SERVE.

How brown and delicious.

NOW TASTE THAT MUSHROOMY RICE.

TASTE IT.

Garlic & Soy Tofu

Garlic & Soy Tofu

When you can't wait for your tofu...make this.

Get in my partially Asian belly

Post-Christmas, I've been craving light food. 

This Tofu is so light I could fly.

Ingredients

The following can all be sourced from your local Chinese Supermarket..

Deep Fried Tofu

Pak Choi

Spring Onions

Garlic

Ginger

Light Soy Sauce

Taiwan Shaohsing Wine (optional)

Sugar

Sesame Oil

So crispy, so crunchy, so full of CHOI.

1. Chop up however much tofu you want to put in your stomach hole

Pre deep fried tofu. SO FLUFFY!

2. Finely slice spring onion, ginger, garlic & Pak Choi- again dependent on how much you want to eat.

Chop chop chop

3. Throw in hot frying pan with a good glug of sesame oil

4. Add half a cap of wine & a little soy sauce. FRY.

Sizzle

5. Sprinkle with a pinch of sugar

6. Turn of heat

7. Serve alone/with rice/with noodles

USE YO CHOPSTICKS

GUZZLE YOUR TOFU WITHOUT FEAR.

Grand Marnier Sauce (for your Christmas Pudding)

Grand Marnier Sauce

(For your Christmas Pud)

'Creamy' Grand Marnier Sauce for this FANCY Xmas Pud

It's never too late in the season for a CHRISTMAS PUD

My non-vegan Mummy was scoffing this accidentally Vegan Christmas Pud with some COW-CREAM BRANDY SAUCE. 

I decided to up her on the sauce & create my own version.

She preferred mine. Obviously.

Accidentally Vegan & delicious CHRISTMAS PUDDING from Waitrose!

Ingredients

1 carton of Alpro Single Soya milk

Cornflour

Sugar

Grand Marnier 

1 VEGAN CHRISTMAS PUDDING

Alpro Soya Cream is the CREAMIEST

1. Pour soya cream into saucepan and heat

2. Add a glug of Grand Marnier

Add however much alcohol you feel your liver can handle

3. Add sugar to taste

4. Mix a heaped spoon of cornflour with a tiny bit of warm water. Mix it till smooth. Add the cornflour mixture to the bubbling cream and stir rapidly until thickened

5. HEAT UP YOUR CHRISTMAS PUD 

Look how Christmassy it is.

NOW EAT YOUR SAUCE-PUDDING COMBO UNTIL YOUR VEGAN BODY EXPLODES WITH CHRISTMASSY EXCITEMENT.

Tofu Scramble

Tofu Scramble with Cheatin' Bacon

Because who needs scrambled eggs when you've got TOFU. 

Tastes significantly better then it looks.

Cheatin' Bacon created by Vbites is the perfect accompaniment to this scrambly breakfast. 

VBites. NOT MEAT.

GET IN MY MORNING BELLY HOLE.

Ingredients

1 Extra-firm block of tofu

Olive Oil

3 or 4 slices of Vbites Cheatin' Bacon (or any Vegan mock bacon)

1/2 Green Pepper

1/2 white onion

1 clove of garlic

1 teasp of Turmeric

1/2 cup of Light Soy Sauce

1 cup of Nutritional Yeast

Black Pepper

Sugar

1. Press water out of tofu. Crumble tofu into bowl. Pour soy sauce over tofu & leave to soak.

2. Chop onion, garlic & green pepper. Fry with olive oil and caramelise with sugar.

Caramelise with OIL & SUGAR

3. Add chopped 'bacon' to frying pan. FRY.

4. Add tofu to the pan. Sprinkle turmeric into pan. PROCEED WITH FURTHER FRYING.

All ready to go in your MOUTH

5. Turn off heat. Stir Nutritional Yeast into tofu. Add Black Pepper to taste.

EAT WITH TOAST & OJ IF SO DESIRED

Scrambled Tofu. ON BREAD. (One bite removed prior to photo being taken...)

DON'T WRITE OFF YOUR MORNING AS A SHAMBLE.

JUST COOK UP SOME OF THIS TOFU-BACON SCRAMBLE.

YES YOU SHOULD.

A Very Vegan Christmas

A Very Vegan Christmas

My first Vegan Christmas. 

My non-Vegan family allowed me to cook up lunch for them. 

AND THEY FUCKING LOVED IT.

Yum Yum in your Vegan tum.

Here is how this Christmas was done...

The following was created & consumed:

'Ah Bisto' Onion Gravy (with added Port)

1 Tempeh 'meat'-loaf

Recipe: http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/11/17/hearty-holiday-main-courses-for-vegans/

1 lentil & nut roast topped with cranberry sauce instead of ketchup

Recipe: http://fuckthebacon.blogspot.co.uk/2013/12/lentil-loaf.html

The Roasts. SO. FILLING. (And nuttily delicious)

Vegan Stuffing balls (added Chestnuts to it for extra joy)

Recipe: http://fuckthebacon.blogspot.co.uk/2013/12/christmas-stuffing-balls-sage-onion.html

Apples from the garden...used for stuffing & apple sauce (Boil apples. Drain them. Mush with fork. Add sugar.=Apple Sauce) NOM IN MY FACEHOLE.

Bread Sauce

Recipe: http://www.veganvillage.co.uk/recipes/breadsauce.htm

Alongside...

Carrots infused with OJ

1. Peel & chop carrots

2. Boil with Orange Juice, a sprinkle of salt & 2 Bay Leaves for 10 minutes

3. Smother in Olive Oil, salt & pepper and roast for 40-50 minutes 180°C

Sweet Carroty goodness

Roast Potatoes (patronising recipe...)

1. Peel & half-boil potatoes

2. Whilst still in saucepan, add sunflower oil, salt, pepper & soya butter. SHAKE WITH LID ON TILL FLUFFY.

3. Roast in oiled tray with fresh rosemary for 1 hour 180°C

DO THE SAME FOR PARSNIPS (drizzle these with Agave Syrup pre-roasting)

My family loved it, yes they did.

Brussel Sprouts with Fakin' Bacon

All fresh & green & good for your body hole.

1. Boil for 5 minutes. Drain.

2. Fry in pan with olive oil, cut-up vegan Bacon, handful of chopped chestnuts, salt & pepper 5-10 minutes

Fry-fry-frying away

Bread Sauce above the BEST SPROUTS EVAR

Cranberry Sauce

1. Grate zest of 1 large orange. Then juice it. 

2.  Add this to 1 box of fresh cranberries in saucepan. 

3. Add some cracked black pepper & 1 cup of sugar. Simmer for 20 mins. 

4. Add more sugar to taste. Add Gran Marnier to taste

Dip yo Brussels in dat

NOW DON'T MAKE EXCUSES FOR NOT KNOWING HOW TO COOK A VEGAN CHRISTMAS SPREAD.

They ate it all up.

SUCK IT UP & SAVE THE TURKEYS.